In part four of the reading, the main character receives an invitation to his daughter’s wedding. He RSVPs by calling his daughter, and although its awkward at first, they begin to reconcile. This reading is generally quite awkward but it also has shock, amazement, and confusion coming up fairly frequently in this chapter. Their awkwardly distant relationship is shown in the quote, “Grandma=Miss Willa, another mental leap across sharp rocks. Mom=Stella. Everyone had a stock role to play but me: The part of the Bennie will be played by Bennie.” (60). He reacts naturally to her calling him Bennie, but then is confused when she calls Stella, Mom, and Miss Willa, Grandma. In most cases this would be the opposite, but alas, the life of Bennie Ford is not most cases. Things go smoothly for a while, but then become awkward again when Bennie asks his daughter if he could walk her down the aisle, to which responds, “Mom would flip” and that “We…we were planning on walking down together I guess,”(62). This comment is a real reality check for Bennie. Although his daughter does end up letting him walk her down the aisle, it really shows Bennie how nonexistent their relationship has been and how he has never been there for his daughter.
This reading, Bennie comes upon realization that he had failed at his marriage, raising his child, his poetry, and many other things, he begins to get depressed. However, upon much introspection he realizes that his life is actually now turning for the better, despite the slight setback in the airport. This is shown in the quote, "Dear American Airlines, you miserable fucks, I'm going to keep writing. I'm going to keep writing and writing and writing and writing and you're going to keep reading and reading because for the first time in my life it wasn't me that blew it--it was you."(66). He is writing the complaint letter so he can move past all of his previous failures. The new leaf which his is turning over may still contain failure, but this time, it will not be his fault. Perhaps now he will reconcile with his ex-wife and possibly develop a relationship with his daughter. Another sentence which shows his improvements is "And I hated myself because I was a shitheel father who didnt even get the joy of parenthood until six or seven months in when Speck was old enough to react to me, to reflect me--which meant Stella was right, that deep down I considered myself the sun, the center of all orbits, my mother's child after all."(75). He is admitting that he was a terrible father, and by doing so he is able to fix his issues and grow as a person. Perhaps it is good that his wife left him, because otherwise he may have never realized what was wrong with his life and continued to be a drunken failure. Now, late in life, he has finally made the necessary changes to be a truly good person.
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4 comments:
This book is definatly on my reading list. I feel bad for Bennie because he realizes that he failed at the most important things going on in his life; his wife and his child. But on the other hand I like how he reflects his life over a series of letters or one long letter to American Airlines and doing so see's the turning point in his life that is happening before his eyes. whats more interesting is that it took him and airline company to get him angry that eventually led him to this realization.
I believe that one of the most courageous things a person can do is to ask forgiveness and reconcile for their shortcomings and wrongdoings. This shows how changed of a man this guy really is and proves how he has learned from his mistakes, as well as finding out what is really important in life.
I feel horrible that Bennie has such an awful relationship with his daughter. I know my dad is someone I can go to for anything and not having him actively involved in my life would just not be right. I think that when he calls his daughter, even if it is just to RSVP, the daughter sees that her dad still cares. I think this knowledge that the other still cares for this is vital to repairing their relationship. I find it amusing, in a sad way, that though Bennie has made many huge mistakes, he feels the need to rub the airline's mistake in their faces. Though I feel like he is in no position to be able to judge an airline, maybe realizing that other's make mistakes will help him come to peace with his mistakes and work to resolve them.
Bennie's relationship with his daughter is almost nonexistant. They are very distant and don;t seem to talk a lot. His many failures in life could very well have impacted his self-sonfidence negatively. However he is trying to change but he will still have to regain his family's acceptance.
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